shapelypear77

Well, it looks like it's time to upgrade from Aldis ravioli in tomato sauce. Servings are smaller and sauce is more like soup. Took, a case of them just to feel full this afternoon. Maybe, it's time to bite the bullet, and start buying the food service #10 cans of ravioli. Any ideas on what to add to make this more of a meal instead of just a snack? I really hate the sloshing feeling of today's lunch. bleah.........

Thought I would add another chat session.

okay whats your kinks and limits and are you into inflation ?

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shapelypear77 said the following:

Sure I guess, though not sure what it would be like to be more limited by ones' own body.

Never really thought about it, as my weight has increased over the years, I've just gotten used to dealing with the restrictions.

oh do you not like being fat ? No, its just I've tried to go on diets before, they last a month or so and I may go down a size or so, but the return cravings usually bloat me up bigger than before. So, I've felt a temporary inflation that push my thighs larger until my hunger resets itself.

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shapelypear77 said the following:

still below 700lbs, thankfully

Ah I've tracked down the post, it was about the apple shaped woman with the yellow tinge on a food background. How my feeder may dream about her and may overlap her shape onto my present body shape. While her shape has gotten to the point of being just a large and an imposing presence. I like the fact that she is there and in harmony with the scene, like a snapshot of someone in their natural environment. Some of your earlier bed shots almost seem like the women in them were being overwhelmed by the surrounding food.

But back to the functional body mechanics, the apple shape may have a balance issue and a wide presence moving through their environment. Their tummies could evolve into an apron, if it extends beyond their pelvic cradle than they have can be in a world of motion issues, lucky if their pants are able to hold that apron above their legs, giving just an oversized FUPA look; or not and having to bump against the apron that has grown towards their knees.

Pears can have issues that affect their locomotion throughout life. If it's just saddle bags, your hips flair out beyond the width of your shoulders and it's just minor clothing issues. Add in thunder thighs and you, lose the thigh gap and your jeans have rub patches on your inner thighs. It's when you add extra fat to the thunder thighs. They begin to get in each other's way. Usual your saddle bags are inflated and start to wrap around causing a chain reaction of a big butt with a shelf like protrusion and a waddle to your gait. Add in your feeders dream of you being bigger, you get thighs that rub all the way down to just beyond your knees, a butt that has an extra bounce and a waddle that's a side-to-side motion. And the icing on the cake, a bust line that's just around a C cup, being that you're pear. So, dream all you like but I'm left a body with motion issues.

Sorry if this is long winded but I feel, sometimes guys need a dose of reality in response to their comments.

ani said the following:

I am tempted towards asking, even if it's a bit intrusive. What sorts of body mechanics have you been feeling dysfunctional? Or which are the body dysfunctions that worry you the most?

Not sure, where you saw a comment of mine, but personally as I've grown from a young athletic bode to a pear, moving each leg around the other has become tiring.

Oh wow. It's interesting to know that you went from athletic to pear shaped. Going from above average mobility to below the average. To what degree has it gotten more difficult to move your legs?

My gait has slowly become a waddle, at first, I'd feel the top of my thighs just, sort of catch on each other as I walked along with the pleasant feeling of pressure from my FUPA on my neither rejoins.

SSBBW? I am not a creep am I, for asking?

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shapelypear77 said the following:

I don't really know, it just lately as I sit by the kitchen table, I start to notice it's just my lower tummy is the only part of me that is filling out. As my top half seems to be packed. I just wonder sometimes, where one crosses the line into Ssbbw size.

Wow, this reads just like great wg fiction except it's based on reality. This is great!!! Please continue.

I see you don't post all that often, and I guess you might be reluctant to attract lots of male attention you're not necessarily looking for and I can understand that. I did, however, read some of your older posts and was intrigued by what you said. I gather you either were or are a big girl. I happen to be an FA but I also have a background in anthropology. I would be curious to ask you a few questions about your experience as a Big Girl. For instance, when and how often are/were you reminded of this?

These "classifications" are a somewhat arbitrary measurement intended to convey some general ideas of size and possibly some of the related issues they may contend with. From what I've heard, SSBBW is a term that applies to #300+ lbs, whereas, the highest class, USSBBW (ultra size super big, beautiful woman) threshold is somewhere around #600+ lbs.

I'm guessing you'd probably be considered a SSBBW if you're using a scale that goes up to 500.

Having super big thighs is something as an FA that I find attractive in a woman but have heard they present a variety of issues (e.g. chafing, shredding pants inseams, etc) and I'm sorry you're no longer able to pursue x-country skiing as a hobby.

Speaking of being a woman of letters, that's kind of why I chose to reach out to you. I've interviewed a couple of USSBBW here and gotten some helpful information but frankly, they were a bit ..... vacuous. I don't get that vibe from you based on your writings, so I'm looking forward to some intelligent insights.

Are you a feedee? What exposure have you had to FA culture either online or in person? (e g. was in a LTR with an FA or attended BBW dance events, or posted on Dimensions, etc)

Yes, big thighs are just something I deal with, true sometimes I wish I could get jeans with an inner thigh of nylon, but that would look weird.

Scales, I retired that scale 7 years ago, and have been using one that goes up to 700 lbs. features I like are talks to me in a mellow manly voice and surface area of about thirty-six by 24 inches square. Thankfully, is doesn't have an Ai logic center to nag about my size. The old one was a hassle to use having to bend over to see the output while having to clinch my legs together to fit on the 14" square. but even that was an improvement over the no thrill home hardware knock off.

Feedee /Foodee... um I do look for foods that have good taste and texture; work does affect my eating habits; a light breakfast, average lunch, and a cheap in factory second lunch then home around midnight. I indulge on the weekends and try not to have a fourth meal before sleeping during the week. So, it adds up, but when I've extra funds, a 4- or 5-hour stint at the local buffet is a monthly event. You read about the body having a set point but each year finding yourself just a bit more in your personal space is worrying.

Exposure to FA culture that's a tough one of course the internet has been an eye opening, stab into my world. Dating has been an on and off experience but lately it just seems to just too much an effort sure I'm looking for long term relationship but the grind of life and maintaining personal upkeep just gets me down at times.

Next, I guess, I'll get back to college and blue-collar work. later it time for work.

What an interesting way of saying SSBBW. But thank you for it. As for the resulting interaction with the world, it is me being aware of the physical space I take up while moving through a world of compactness equaling a way to create more income in smaller spaces. While I do enjoy the bargains of a Dollar General store walking through the store gives me a pause whether to venture off the main isles as they cram more into the store. When you're wider than their carts and the spacing leaves just one or two inches for the cart to thread the needle.

Thank you for responding. So, do you prefer to be referred to as a Ssbbw? Looking at your profile you indicate you like being outdoors. Does that mean you really like doing things like camping and cross-country skiing? I would imagine being super-sized poses challenges to these activities. Is your general approach to avoid or embrace those challenges? Or both maybe?

Have you always been fat, even as a child? Were/are your parents very heavy? Were you an average sized kid? When did you start to get very overweight (say, 200 lbs), was it as an adult or maybe late adolescent? I'm interested in what you may recall being early negative interactions with members of the public where people might have either said something mean spirited or been judgmental in a negative way? I saw in one of your posts a group of teenagers were acting out towards you at a restaurant, but I wouldn't assume that to be your first negative interaction for being fat. (I assume you have no problem with me referring to you as fat?). Do family or friends give you grief about your weight and/or assume you're trying to lose weight?

So can you tell me a little about your educational background? I gather you have at least some college? I also want to ask you about positive interactions related to your size but let's save that subject for later.

Hmm, how to respond, SSBBW is just a classification of how the public tries fit someone beyond their scope of life. Being bigger is something I've grown into no fat parents or youth. When I was in my twenties cross country skiing was doable, but as I aged into my 30's and beyond, being pear has drawbacks having to push my thighs around each other, that isn't something that the body mechanics of cross-country skiing allows. Camping is something I do as it's a yearly reset from my grind of work. I think taking a pay increase with the move to second shift has accelerated my gradual entry into being classed as a lettered woman. I wonder at what point someone moves beyond SSBBW........

I'm asking entirely apart from any academic interest and purely as a straight FA...but does that round jiggly looking pear shaped bottom in your avatar by any chance belong to you?

I promise I will try not to wax poetic if you respond 'yes'

Yes, but it's years old, like most profile pics it's a slimmer version, plus I'm working on getting some color.

Damn another slow morning, only two loads of laundry, one of jeans and work pants, the other all my oversized undergarments and their five delicate bags. The things I must do to make things last, sure panties are cheap but Bras..... one, making sure they fit properly; but also shelling out 45 to 65 dollars a pop really adds up over the year.

Well, I guess in jeans it is a true case. But bras, you almost need to reengineer them when going from DD to a J, when you're this big they're about the same cost but not a JCP buy. When looking at my J bras I think two things lately christ, no wonder my lower back tweaks, and finally I'm not in the itty-bitty tit club as they aren't as tiny compared to my bottom pear.

It was after a while I got tired of my breasts bulging out around the DD bras, took a while to figure what size to go up to cover my side boobs. For reference, a DD sits about 4" out from the chest wall, and well a J cup sits about 12" from the chest wall. About a third of the space in the J cup is taking up by my side boobs. It creates a look I like as it looks like I know what size I really am and not trying to squeeze into an outdated wardrobe. Sounds like one needs a degree in engineering to contend with bigger bras. So, did you go from wearing a DD right to a J when you figured out the different design consideration, or was there an intermediate step or two there? In fact, I should ask how rapidly you have gained since school. Was it at a steady and consistent pace or have there been periods of rapid gain for whatever reason? No more of a year or two as I slowly gained. I guess, the body fills certain parts out first, before the rest of you, a bust increase, getting a bigger butt that slowly wrapped around to the front of my thighs, upper arms getting larger and my elbows becoming a dimple at the joint.

I didn't realize you were quite tall as you are, and that information isn't necessarily conveyed in your avatar photo. In fact, I didn't realize you were as big busted as you describe either. I have learned over the years that it's one thing to appreciate or be attracted to various parts of anatomy, but an entirely different thing to have to live in that body. This, however, appears to be the cards that were dealt. Would you say you're overall not at peace with your body?

Either way, I must admit I'm thoroughly enjoying the story as you're telling it. Please do go on....

Big busted yeah, right, more like, just big fat deposits to me.

I had someone take that pic and told them to make me look smaller in stature, I was finding men didn't like taller women, was really affecting the pool of available dates when I was looking for an LTR in collage, being 5' 10.5". Sure, mom had hips but got my build from dad of Irish descent, who was 6' 6" and his Damn big sized feet as well. Laters time for work....

Hmm life as a non-adult, Mom was on the plump side dad was tall person, but both were watchful on how and what I ate. I've inherited my dad's size, both encouraged I try anything. Mom was do cheer it will help build social and it is fun it was for me in my youth. Dad said tennis, you got the build and you're stronger. I've tried softball and soccer though at that point it hadn't been introduced in the country yet as a main stay. WAS, introduced to dance, mostly east coast formal stuff: waltz, Chacha, and foxtrot. This was another push into being more social. Dance class introduced semi formal dresses and the start of cover up arts. Still slim at this point though late bloomer, my hips were starting to flair, bust line was still a wishful event. Dad was transferred out to the Midwest in the late 1970s, Square dancing was a revelation, you could have group fun without all the formal trappings.

Leaving my teen years behind, I had learned a few things, cheer was a nightmare in the making sure it was a push into having a social life, but when you're still lanky and still flat chested, uncoordinated, and a total Clutz.

Girls in my squad were like um, what's wrong with you? So, two seasons of being on the outside wasn't the steppingstone mom hoped it would be. Tennis though was fun you could get by with technique and the power I gained form dad made me awesome, plus it was a loner sport, so I was social without having to be in the in group like cheer was.

College was an emotional roller coaster, where I made lasting friendships, where they tried to pull me out of bouts of depression. When my insecurities of body image were all I thought people saw.

I was able to get into college, just a local out of state school, this was where I had access to college food service and the freedom of nonparental supervision.

After starting Collage, my eating habits started to change. It was no longer a structured three meals a day, it was going in when I was hungry, and staying till I felt full. At first these were short stays, but as the Freshman year progressed my meals were becoming hour long events. Needless to say, my high school athletic build was slowly starting to soften, guess I really had mom's genetic makeup after all.

The first summer home, mom was like finally you're starting to have a womanly shape, later though she was voicing her concern over my eating habits. The only summer job I was able to find was a front desk job at the local meat market, i.e. health club, so I would work out after hours still stay fit, although my pear shape was starting to emerge.

Clothing shopping went from Forever 21, if you stayed as a size twelve or below. To Torrid and the Dress Barn, I still like the freedom of movement dresses allowed. The jeans were distressing as they just made my butt look huge. So, when it was time to go back, I took dresses in the plus range of 18 to 22 and some leggings with plenty of stretch, just to cheap out as my clothing was coming out of my purse. On a lark I stopped at Torrid for some new sleepwear as the fitted Pjs weren't so. anymore. When you're just under six feet tall, a lot of the time things that fit in length are monstrous in size. So, sleepwear was in the eight to12 X-large range. I remember these looking as wide as tall, but they fit in length and looked pretty with some of the fun graphic prints, maybe, I could get them to shrink in the wash. Sophomore year was the year I would try and get back on the social path, try some women collage sports.

Going back to classes in the sophomore year, I hadn't gotten to the point where housing was a solo event yet. This year I was paired with Rebeca or just Becky as she liked to be called. At this point I was pushing 240 lbs. up about 50 to 60 lbs. from the start of last year. Gone was the statuette figure that tennis had sculpted, and I was starting to feel frumpy. But Becky was let's say, an opposite of me, shorter by about eight inches and wider by about two feet a classic apple shaped woman very sure of herself and knowing how to dress herself in the latest fashions.

Classes were ok, taking filler courses and the start of general business classes, management for Becky and accounting for me. I tried to reconnect with Alice from my freshman year but being heavier than the year before seemed to knock me out of her social click. After being rejected by Alice, I concentrated on learning all I could from Becky. Since most of the sorority groups were above our standards, we tried and succeeded to get into a business fraternity. They were a real help in getting my accounting classes up to a B level in scholastics. On the sport scene I tried getting back into tennis, but I was slow so slow, and softball was better but the added weight from summer break had the coach telling me about a program to get me back into what they thought would be prime shape.

My enemy; the food court. At the start of the fall, I was still pretty with a nice figure of 38-32-42, still with a tiny thigh gap, but a bit on the soft side feeling like I had gotten a 2" layer of skin over my body. Ok I was getting Fat. But with Becky as a new friend, a live in companion I was losing the perspective of what fitness was with Becky as an everyday comparison, even though I'm not as big as her. What a trap that ended up being. My habits were starting to rub off on her as she started eating only when she was hungry and with us dining together, we stayed until both were sated.

Becky did help me on the clothing front, pushing me away from the Alice mode of wrong body shape and dressing like her, since I was like her but a just a bit thicker. Showing how YouTube can be helpful if you know where to look. Like how to draw away from black and try different solid colors. How, I should stick to hipster and control briefs, drop the French cut and anything provides the least amount of coverage, and stay away from thongs, tanga or gods above the newer C string.

That summer I decided to stay on campus and worked for the college over the summer.

Still having access to collage food court made things interesting, as at the start of summer I thought I was done with any growth, my figure was now 42-40-58, thigh gap long gone, in fact my knees were just a dimpled after thought as my locomotion was a waddle of forced rubbing down to my mid calves. I had almost caught up to Becky at the start of the year, starting summer. Her donated clothes still fitted loosely but I wasn't sure how much longer they would last. But at least I was able to stay in the office doing mind numbing work as long as I was able to get an armless chair. Dresses are nice clothing option as they hide a lot of myself, as summer came closer to the junior fall classes. up work time later

I've heard several full-figured women say that dresses are a godsend. Yards of loose flowing fabric is comfortably unrestrictive and covers yards of loose flowing body. 58" hips? Wow, that's pretty cushy! And the 18" difference between waist and hips is quite jaw dropping. The stuff of dreams for an FA.

At this point, summer is over, the scale is clocking in at 550lbs and I'm a little fatter up top, but any semblance of a waist is gone. I got Becky as a roommate again and her greeting comment was you've gotten a bigger presence now. I was at the end of her donated dresses not really daring to bend over in fear of my ass ripping through the back; I was dealing with a bloated feeling, just standing up. My figure had blossomed out to 44-52-64. My hips barely cast a pear shape.

Wow a FOOT extra around the waist? I guess you were hungry! That's approaching bell shape, but that's still pear territory. But, wow, 68" hips... almost as big around as tall. Did you ever eventually achieve that distinction? What is it like to have hips that big? Well, if it's a slow gain in size you just start to look at the world around you. You try to get like cat whiskers in your mind to unconsciously judge spaces in which you navigate in your travels. It's when you're living with a fast gain, say within a month, you get problems, bruised hips, a tummy aprons down to your thighs, having to remove all breakables from your paths and a future doctor visit of him or her if you're lucky saying ah hmm you know Tracy...........

Yes, 52" around where my waist should have been. I don't know at this point in life, even when trying to reduce my intake, my body seemed in a storage mode. Plus, the fact I was getting bigger than Becky. The dresses were all that I wore, but it felt like I was graduating into circus tent sizes.

This year, as upperclassmen, we qualified for the on-location suites. We decided on one geared for handicap use. Nice small laundry, private baths for each bedroom, lounge areas; full kitchen like getting us ready for life after collage. The master bedroom suite came with the biggest bathroom and had a bigger tub. The other bath had an equally large Walkin style shower stall. I tried the tub version but got wedged in the tub. Talk, about imbursement, Becky, being smaller, was able to get in and out no problem. So, I got the Walkin, I had some mods done to it though, a temperature-controlled valve, added a multi head set up with a 12-foot handheld attachment. Lastly a Carousel Sliding Shower Chair Tub Transfer Bench with Swivel Seat rated at 800lbs, figured never wanted any possibility of failure during bathing time.

In the kitchen we add a secondary frig/freezer combo and set the microwave to a just below counter set up. We both kept the food service option, but Becky left hers at one meal a day, while I opted for the 3-meal version. They started a new twist to the service, using the school intranet you could order meals in advance and have like uber delivery. Wonderful thing I found was with the 3-meal deal, you could stockpile meals for like 2 weeks at a time.

For classes we were both done with the general courses' requirement, and time to concentrate on career course choices. Becky was going for all business mode and management courses. I started to do accounting and a splattering of mechanical engineering and some electrical. So going into non-people interaction type jobs; seemed like a smart move as I was getting more limited in my locomotion. sighs, time for work.

Say, you're both intelligent and literate, what are your views on Maverickwriter's article?

um, well he feels that there are two avenues of females getting larger than life. An outside influence of a spouse and a semi willing copartner that may try an alternate lifestyle. Or a downward spiral of depression where it seems to the public eye that we don't care about our own upkeep or what they perceive a female should look like.

Moods can be a bitch to deal with as most of ours's affected by hormonal shifts in our body's chemistry. Just look at all the post pregnancy problems that crop up, then the partner doesn't understand. Again, the public perception of how they think us females should be acting. Sorry to cut this short but time to finish making brown bag for work, laters.............

So, just for kicks, decided to measure things as my clothes were getting a bit more than snug lately. Hmm, that's odd now down to 5'8" and getting closer to the limit of my 700lb talking scale. Maybe, this is why I need to stand further away to see myself in the mirror instead of just my belly. Tummy, when standing is about 78" and starting to apron, hmm, almost, at the point of commando possibility stage. Thankfully, my bras still fit and keep the girls on top of my tummy instead of sloping to the sides. Starting, to see more gray in my roots area. Footwear is getting tight too, not really wanting to look for 5 E widths, i.e. more drab choices. This may be the year I'm forced into dresses as my main wardrobe element, as even internet order jeans are really a size or three too small. So yeah, happy birthday week, more of a reality check to myself. But on the bright side, I get my black beauty back from the dealer in a month.